Member for Charters Towers, Shane Knuth is eagerly anticipating the future of Queensland following the formation of the new conservative force in politics, the LNP.
Mr Knuth said the party will bring great benefits to Queensland. “This exciting decision to form a new conservative party will solve the issues of three-cornered contests and most importantly the splitting of the conservative vote which has been costly at every election.”
Mr Knuth said it has also solved the issue of who would be Premier. Mr Knuth added that the blame for current crises in infrastructure, loss of services including health, closure of railways and rising costs on all fronts can rightly be laid at the feet of the present State Labor Government, but the Opposition can also share some of the blame for being weak and divided.
“The new LNP will provide a fresh alternative that will present good, strong policies and give Queenslanders a credible choice. There is a long way to go to removing the Government’s majority in Parliament but with a united front this is very achievable.” Mr Knuth said.
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Fari The Fruiterer
Fari the Fruiterer
Visits
Torrens Creek
Every second Wednesday.
Time – 3-30
23rd July
6th August
20th August.
3rd September
Venue - 27 Torrens Street.
Burn-off a bit of a Fizzer.
Despite the fire brigade’s best efforts, Saturday’s training day failed to produce enough flames to test the volunteers’ skills. Areas around town proved to be too green still to gain the desired results.
Brigade members gathered at the tennis courts 8.30 Saturday morning prepared for a day of action on the home front.
Communication appears to have improved in the past month or so but still some locals had short warning of the burn-off activity
Next time maybe a schedule advising the public where the burn-offs are to take place could be posted prior to the exercise?
Protective gear was worn by some members. It’s good to see the planning actually in action and saves confusion for the uninitiated. Now the only question is – what happens at a burn-off when you can’t raise a spark?
For Your Information.
Today I received a letter in the post demanding that I not use the sender’s name, show photos, etc. referring to his home, wife, environment. This includes drawings (didn’t know my artistic prowess was known?). He also asked me to print a letter to the editor from him. I reserved my editorial rights..
I am sorry if I have inadvertently upset some citizens of this area. I report the news as I see it happen. Because this a non funded newsletter I feel I am entitled to my opinion.
I will not print any letters to the editor that are self-seeking or distort the truth. I will print news from the area. Especially the positive aspects. However, I will keep copies of letters received available for interested viewers.
The letter forbids me show many aspects of the growth of the town environment. So be it!
Freedom of Speech is not a Constitutional Right.
I may say openly what I think, and be denigrated by a covert group who can pressure me and spread false and unsubstantiated gossip. Law tells me I have the right to print the names of those who wish to gag me, plus photos taken from public venues, but the cost in time and money inhibits me. To me, this is thuggery, that bullies reign.
Surely Freedom of speech is one or our rights? If not – why not?
I am sorry if I have inadvertently upset some citizens of this area. I report the news as I see it happen. Because this a non funded newsletter I feel I am entitled to my opinion.
I will not print any letters to the editor that are self-seeking or distort the truth. I will print news from the area. Especially the positive aspects. However, I will keep copies of letters received available for interested viewers.
The letter forbids me show many aspects of the growth of the town environment. So be it!
Freedom of Speech is not a Constitutional Right.
I may say openly what I think, and be denigrated by a covert group who can pressure me and spread false and unsubstantiated gossip. Law tells me I have the right to print the names of those who wish to gag me, plus photos taken from public venues, but the cost in time and money inhibits me. To me, this is thuggery, that bullies reign.
Surely Freedom of speech is one or our rights? If not – why not?
Media Upgrade.
The upgrade for television and radio reception has been completed in Hughenden. A 27 metre tower dedicated to improving media reception has been erected, replacing the old system. The upgrade increased the power for Imparja and SBS television from 10 watts to 100 watts. The town also has access to two new radio stations, SBS and ABC 4JJJ.
Unfortunately Torrens Creek – the fringe dwellers – do not gain any benefit from this upgrade.
Unfortunately Torrens Creek – the fringe dwellers – do not gain any benefit from this upgrade.
More Spoilers @ Work.
The following message was circulated on the internet a couple of weeks ago. My daughter forwarded it to me.
MISSING Evan Trembley'Bulliwallah' Charters Towers, Q, 4820 (07)49835287 0412030927
Please look at the picture, read what his mother says, then forward this message on.
My 15 year old boy, Evan Trembley, is missing. He has been missing now for two weeks. Maybe if everyone passes this on, someone will see this child That is how the girl from Stevens Point was found by circulation of her picture on tv.
The internet circulates even overseas, South America , and Canada etc. Please pass this to everyone in your address book. With GOD on his side he will be found.
'I am asking you all, begging you to please forward this email on to anyone and everyone you know, PLEASE. It is still not too late. Please help us. If anyone knows anything, please contact me at: HelpfindEvanTrembley@yahoocom I am including a picture of him. All prayers are appreciated! ! ' It only takes 2 seconds to forward this. If it was your child, you would want all the help you could get!!
Grabs you , doesn’t it? Who wouldn’t want to help? I rang the Charters Towers police to inquire about the boy. It is a hoax. Probably a way to gather more addresses for Spam delivery, or to spread a virus. Be aware of what you forward.
MISSING Evan Trembley'Bulliwallah' Charters Towers, Q, 4820 (07)49835287 0412030927
Please look at the picture, read what his mother says, then forward this message on.
My 15 year old boy, Evan Trembley, is missing. He has been missing now for two weeks. Maybe if everyone passes this on, someone will see this child That is how the girl from Stevens Point was found by circulation of her picture on tv.
The internet circulates even overseas, South America , and Canada etc. Please pass this to everyone in your address book. With GOD on his side he will be found.
'I am asking you all, begging you to please forward this email on to anyone and everyone you know, PLEASE. It is still not too late. Please help us. If anyone knows anything, please contact me at: HelpfindEvanTrembley@yahoocom I am including a picture of him. All prayers are appreciated! ! ' It only takes 2 seconds to forward this. If it was your child, you would want all the help you could get!!
Grabs you , doesn’t it? Who wouldn’t want to help? I rang the Charters Towers police to inquire about the boy. It is a hoax. Probably a way to gather more addresses for Spam delivery, or to spread a virus. Be aware of what you forward.
The Pentland Gallery.
How long is it since you visited the Pentland Art Gallery? It is well worth a stop - or for that matter, just a trip out of town.
Tourists take a break there, have a snack and browse through the rooms. They are amazed at the variety of goods on display, "for such a small place." There are plenty of gift ideas for that last minute present you have trouble buying. Bags, pottery, painting and jewelry are a few of offerings.
The Gallery also offers a book swapping service, a selection of pre loved clothing and stacks of magazines where you will probably find that article you wanted to keep but threw out in a cleaning frenzy.
Tourists take a break there, have a snack and browse through the rooms. They are amazed at the variety of goods on display, "for such a small place." There are plenty of gift ideas for that last minute present you have trouble buying. Bags, pottery, painting and jewelry are a few of offerings.
The Gallery also offers a book swapping service, a selection of pre loved clothing and stacks of magazines where you will probably find that article you wanted to keep but threw out in a cleaning frenzy.
Samples of Work inside the Gallery.
Historically Speaking
The Gallery has a museum room where donated artifacts will jog many memories of objects once familiar, now almost forgotten. Wandering through the grounds of the old butchery you find reminders from yester- year and the old jail has an atmosphere all its own.
Tips to help Fight the Flu.
I found these tips from Dr. Stafford Maclennan in an old (1988) Family Circle. Thought I’d pass them on. (Yes, I found it at the Gallery!)
1. Bed rest and warmth. That’s right - go to bed! Take a hot bath first and a hot lemon drink. If you’re still cold, turn on the electric blanket.
2. Aspirin – still one of the best drugs to help fight a cold. Take two with that lemon drink.
3. Inhalations. Friar’s Balsam is an old favourite.
4. Cough Lozenges. These ease the throat and nasal passages, give a clean taste to the mouth.
5. Tissues, not handkerchiefs. (I use a toilet roll – lasts a lot longer) Don’t forget to have a container to hold the used tissues.
6. Take lots of vitamin C. Helps build up resistance.
7. Diet. Eat what you feel like. Hot soup for some or fresh fruit for others, depends what suits your taste (if you have one).
8. Cough syrups. As you improve, a dry cough may develop. A soothing linctus can work wonders.
9. Garlic is a natural antibiotic and acts well as a decongestant. Antibiotics are only effective against bacterial infections, not viruses so garlic is not particularly useful in treating a cold.
10. Gargle? Some swear by it. If you must gargle, it is better, and cheaper, to use plain salt and water (a teaspoon of salt added to a cup of boiled and cooled water).
1. Bed rest and warmth. That’s right - go to bed! Take a hot bath first and a hot lemon drink. If you’re still cold, turn on the electric blanket.
2. Aspirin – still one of the best drugs to help fight a cold. Take two with that lemon drink.
3. Inhalations. Friar’s Balsam is an old favourite.
4. Cough Lozenges. These ease the throat and nasal passages, give a clean taste to the mouth.
5. Tissues, not handkerchiefs. (I use a toilet roll – lasts a lot longer) Don’t forget to have a container to hold the used tissues.
6. Take lots of vitamin C. Helps build up resistance.
7. Diet. Eat what you feel like. Hot soup for some or fresh fruit for others, depends what suits your taste (if you have one).
8. Cough syrups. As you improve, a dry cough may develop. A soothing linctus can work wonders.
9. Garlic is a natural antibiotic and acts well as a decongestant. Antibiotics are only effective against bacterial infections, not viruses so garlic is not particularly useful in treating a cold.
10. Gargle? Some swear by it. If you must gargle, it is better, and cheaper, to use plain salt and water (a teaspoon of salt added to a cup of boiled and cooled water).
Recipes
Have you noticed how food follows fashion? A new recipe appears and the food magazines carry look- (or should it be taste?) a-like clones of the new taste.
Here’s some old ideas that are quick and tasty.
Marinate chicken or pork in a mixture of yogurt, ginger, pepper, garlic, paprika and chopped coriander, then bake or cook in a covered pan, basting from time to time with remaining marinade.
Coat fish fillets in instant potato flakes before frying. Deliciously different and no mess.
Here’s some old ideas that are quick and tasty.
Marinate chicken or pork in a mixture of yogurt, ginger, pepper, garlic, paprika and chopped coriander, then bake or cook in a covered pan, basting from time to time with remaining marinade.
Coat fish fillets in instant potato flakes before frying. Deliciously different and no mess.
From the Editor's Desk
Hi, I’m back again. This time I have the correct web address for the online Torrens Creek Telegraph. Here it is http://torrenscreektelegraph.blogspot.com/
Any news you would like to share please leave comments at the blog and I will get back to you. I will try to keep the blog current as of today, all being well.
Since the last newsletter I have been thinking about the changes that have happened in the town after the newsletter ceased.
I mentioned a few last edition but the more material things were forgotten. For instance the demise of the old house behind the hotel. Sad to see such a beautiful old restorable disintegrate under the bulldozers. All that reclaimable material trashed.
Positive things have happened. Two new buildings have been built among the
gum trees. One on the west of town, the other on the east. Both are on Torrens Street.Torrens Street has been sealed east of Maude Street.
A public toilet is planned for the Railway reserve area Meanwhile the Flying Doctor’s toilet is being used for that purpose until building is completed. Building should be completed by end of October. An early Christmas Present
Also since the last newsletter ceased we have an increase of expertise in the village. We now can boast an accomplished dancer, a carpenter, a computer builder, and a sign writer(?).
What school was that again?
Thanks for the generous response to the new Newsletter. It was great to hear of people discussing it around the tracks.
Unfortunately it is not possible to please all the people all the time. I guess not all news is good news, but that’s life and we must live with it.
Despite dented egos and bush lawyers I will try to keep communications flowing freely. Till next issue, keep well. Frances.
Are You Lonely???
Don't Like working on your own?
Hate making decisions?
THEN CALL A MEETING!!!
You can....
SEE people,
DRAW charts,
FEEL important,
MAKE meaningless
RECOMMENDATIONS -
ALL on Company time!
MEETINGS -
THE PRACTICAL ALTERNATIVE TO
WORK.
The Good News is...
After an exhaustive review of the research literature,
here's the final word on nutrition and health:
1. Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart
attacks than us.
2. Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart
attacks than us.
3. Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer
heart attacks than us.
4. Italians drink excessive amounts of red wine and suffer
fewer heart attacks than us.
5. Germans drink beer and eat lots of sausages and
fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
CONCLUSION:
Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently
what kills you, but the Government is trying to correct the problem.
here's the final word on nutrition and health:
1. Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart
attacks than us.
2. Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart
attacks than us.
3. Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer
heart attacks than us.
4. Italians drink excessive amounts of red wine and suffer
fewer heart attacks than us.
5. Germans drink beer and eat lots of sausages and
fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
CONCLUSION:
Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently
what kills you, but the Government is trying to correct the problem.
Child's POV
Should children witness childbirth? Good question. Here's your answer.Due to a power outage, only one paramedic responded to the call.
The house was very dark so the paramedic asked Kathleen, a 3-yr old girlto hold a flashlight high over her mommy so he could see while he helpeddeliver the baby. Very diligently, Kathleen did as she was asked. Heidipushed and pushed and after a little while, Connor was born. Theparamedic lifted him by his little feet and spanked him on his bottom.
Connor began to cry. The paramedic then thanked Kathleen for her help and asked the wide-eyed 3-yr old what she thought about what she had justwitnessed.Kathleen quickly responded, "He shouldn't have crawled in there in thefirst place......smack his butt again!"
The house was very dark so the paramedic asked Kathleen, a 3-yr old girlto hold a flashlight high over her mommy so he could see while he helpeddeliver the baby. Very diligently, Kathleen did as she was asked. Heidipushed and pushed and after a little while, Connor was born. Theparamedic lifted him by his little feet and spanked him on his bottom.
Connor began to cry. The paramedic then thanked Kathleen for her help and asked the wide-eyed 3-yr old what she thought about what she had justwitnessed.Kathleen quickly responded, "He shouldn't have crawled in there in thefirst place......smack his butt again!"
Sunday, July 27, 2008
More Winners.
A big winner at the Hughenden show this year,
Desley Webb, from Mundoo Bluff, displays her crochet table runner with well deserved pride.
Look at those awards and the quality of the fine workmanship.
Well done Desley. Do you take orders?
Saturday Night Live @ The Exchange Hotel.
Saturday Night is Dart Night. Donations of 50c go to Kiara Fire Brigade. With a larger group than usual last Saturday the game was changed slightly. First game was 301. Barry Mead got the double score. The second game was Golf. Wayne Collin came out grinning. And that was after a hard day’s golf at Hughenden. Fitting end to the day.
Barry the brave
What Andy Rooney said on CBS '60 Minutes' a few weeks back: (and he’s still on air!)
"I don't think being a minority makes you a victim of anything except numbers. The only things I can think of that are truly discriminatory are things like the United Negro College Fund, Jet Magazine, Black Entertainment Television, and Miss Black America.
Try to have things like the United Caucasian College Fund, Cloud Magazine, White Entertainment Television, or Miss White America; and see what happens...Jesse Jackson will be knocking down your door.
Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to ban you from driving to the ball game.
I believe they are called the Boy Scouts for a reason, which is why there are no girls allowed. Girls belong in the Girl Scouts! ARE YOU LISTENING MARTHA BURKE?
I think that if you feel homosexuality is wrong, it is not a phobia, it is an opinion. I have the right 'NOT' to be tolerant of others because they are different, weird, or tick me off.
When 70% of the people who get arrested are black, in cities where 70% of the population is black, that is not racial profiling; it is the Law of Probability.
I believe that if you are selling me a milkshake, a pack of cigarettes, a newspaper or a hotel room, you must do it in English! As a matter of fact, if you want to be an American/Canadian/British citizen, you should have to speak English! My father and grandfather didn't die in vain so you can leave the countries you were born in to come over and disrespect ours.
I think the police should have every right to shoot or arrest you if you threaten them after they tell you to stop. If you can't understand the word 'freeze' or 'stop' in English, see the above lines. I don't think just because you were not born in this country, you are qualified for any special National Assistance, loan programs, government sponsored bank loans or tax breaks, etc., so you can open a hotel, coffee shop, corner store, or any other business.
We did not go to the aid of certain foreign countries and risk our lives in wars to defend their freedoms, so that decades later they could come over here and tell us our constitution is a living document; and open to their interpretations.
I don't hate the rich I don't pity the poor I know pro wrestling is fake, but so are movies and television. That doesn't stop you from watching them.
I think Bill Gates has every right to keep every penny he made and continue to make more. If it ticks you off, go and invent the next operating system that's better, and put your name on the building.
It doesn't take a whole village to raise a child right, but it does take a parent to stand up to the kid; and smack their little behinds when necessary, and say 'NO!'
I think tattoos and piercing are fine if you want them, but please don't pretend they are a political statement. And, please, stay home until that new lip ring heals. I don't want to look at your ugly infected mouth as you serve me French fries!
I am sick of 'Political Correctness.' I know a lot of black people, and not a single one of them was born in Africa ; so how can they be 'African-Americans/Canadian/British'? Besides, Africa is a continent. I don't go around saying I am a European-American because my great, great, great, great, great, great grandfather was from Europe .
I am proud to be from America and nowhere else And if you don't like my point of view, tough...I PLEDGE ALLEGIANCE TO THE Canadian FLAG, to the BRITISH FLAG & TO THE FLAG OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA , AND TO THE REPUBLIC, FOR WHICH IT STANDS, ONE NATION UNDER GOD, INDIVISIBLE, WITH LIBERTY AND JUSTICE FOR ALL!
It is said that on average 86% of Canadians/ Americans & British believe in God. Therefore I have a very hard time understanding why there is such a problem in having 'In God We Trust' on American money and having 'God' in the Pledge of Allegiance. Why don't we just tell the 15%+ to BE QUIET!!!
www.cbsnews.com/sections/60minutes/rooney/
Try to have things like the United Caucasian College Fund, Cloud Magazine, White Entertainment Television, or Miss White America; and see what happens...Jesse Jackson will be knocking down your door.
Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to ban you from driving to the ball game.
I believe they are called the Boy Scouts for a reason, which is why there are no girls allowed. Girls belong in the Girl Scouts! ARE YOU LISTENING MARTHA BURKE?
I think that if you feel homosexuality is wrong, it is not a phobia, it is an opinion. I have the right 'NOT' to be tolerant of others because they are different, weird, or tick me off.
When 70% of the people who get arrested are black, in cities where 70% of the population is black, that is not racial profiling; it is the Law of Probability.
I believe that if you are selling me a milkshake, a pack of cigarettes, a newspaper or a hotel room, you must do it in English! As a matter of fact, if you want to be an American/Canadian/British citizen, you should have to speak English! My father and grandfather didn't die in vain so you can leave the countries you were born in to come over and disrespect ours.
I think the police should have every right to shoot or arrest you if you threaten them after they tell you to stop. If you can't understand the word 'freeze' or 'stop' in English, see the above lines. I don't think just because you were not born in this country, you are qualified for any special National Assistance, loan programs, government sponsored bank loans or tax breaks, etc., so you can open a hotel, coffee shop, corner store, or any other business.
We did not go to the aid of certain foreign countries and risk our lives in wars to defend their freedoms, so that decades later they could come over here and tell us our constitution is a living document; and open to their interpretations.
I don't hate the rich I don't pity the poor I know pro wrestling is fake, but so are movies and television. That doesn't stop you from watching them.
I think Bill Gates has every right to keep every penny he made and continue to make more. If it ticks you off, go and invent the next operating system that's better, and put your name on the building.
It doesn't take a whole village to raise a child right, but it does take a parent to stand up to the kid; and smack their little behinds when necessary, and say 'NO!'
I think tattoos and piercing are fine if you want them, but please don't pretend they are a political statement. And, please, stay home until that new lip ring heals. I don't want to look at your ugly infected mouth as you serve me French fries!
I am sick of 'Political Correctness.' I know a lot of black people, and not a single one of them was born in Africa ; so how can they be 'African-Americans/Canadian/British'? Besides, Africa is a continent. I don't go around saying I am a European-American because my great, great, great, great, great, great grandfather was from Europe .
I am proud to be from America and nowhere else And if you don't like my point of view, tough...I PLEDGE ALLEGIANCE TO THE Canadian FLAG, to the BRITISH FLAG & TO THE FLAG OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA , AND TO THE REPUBLIC, FOR WHICH IT STANDS, ONE NATION UNDER GOD, INDIVISIBLE, WITH LIBERTY AND JUSTICE FOR ALL!
It is said that on average 86% of Canadians/ Americans & British believe in God. Therefore I have a very hard time understanding why there is such a problem in having 'In God We Trust' on American money and having 'God' in the Pledge of Allegiance. Why don't we just tell the 15%+ to BE QUIET!!!
www.cbsnews.com/sections/60minutes/rooney/
Strange News from Around the World.
Dentist Who Hates It When That Happens:
Anne Greer filed a lawsuit in June against Winter Park, Fla., dentist Wesley Meyers over the death of her father last year during procedures to secure his dentures with implants. During the October 2006 visit, Meyers had accidentally dropped a screwdriver down the patient's throat, which required a colonoscopy to remove. The man returned the following year to give Meyers another chance (against his daughter's wishes), and during that procedure, Meyers accidentally dropped a torque wrench down his throat, creating problems that ultimately proved fatal. [WKMG-TV (Orlando), 6-22-08]
Government in Action!
In April, Army medic Monica Brown was awarded the Silver Star for bravery for selflessly subjecting herself to enemy fire in order to treat fallen comrades in battle in Afghanistan. However, two days after her heroics, she had been ordered home, against her will, because generals were nervous that a female appeared to be "in combat," which violates Army rules. [Washington Post, 5-1-08]
By contrast, in April (according to The Buffalo News), the Army, citing personnel shortages, ordered honorably discharged soldier James Raymond back to duty, even though he is on medical disability for a knee injury and loss of hearing suffered in Afghanistan. (Soldiers on "Readiness Reserve" are still eligible for duty if necessary.) [Buffalo News, 4-16-08]
Closer to Home...
New Zealand man convicted of assault with hedgehog.
WELLINGTON (AFP) - A New Zealand man has been convicted for assaulting a teenager with a hedgehog after asking him if he wanted to "wear a hedgehog helmet".
William Singalargh, 27, was fined for assault and offensive behaviour by a court in the east coast North Island city of Whakatane after a more serious charge of assault with a weapon -- the hedgehog -- was dropped.
Singalargh claimed he was not the hedgehog hurler, but judge Ian Thomas preferred the evidence of other witnesses who identified him by the bright orange trousers he was wearing.
The 15-year-old boy was returning home with two friends when he was confronted by four men on the road outside his home, the court was told.
Singalargh was holding a hedgehog and asked the boy: "Do you want to wear a hedgehog helmet?"
After the boy declined, Singhalargh threw the prickly weapon, leaving a large red welt and four quills lodged in his hip.
When the boy's mother intervened to prevent a second throw, Singalargh pulled down his trousers and exposed his buttocks.
"He admitted to having been in possession of a hedgehog," police Constable Lyndon Reid said.
"He originally claimed that the group had been playing hacky sack with it," Reid said, referring to a game in which the aim is to keep up a small ball or bean bag in the air.
It was not clear if the hedgehog had been dead at the time of the assault, but Thomas described the case as "much do about nothing in many respects".
And...
Methane's longstanding menace as a climate-altering greenhouse gas is closer than ever to being controlled, said New Zealand scientists in June after genome-mapping found the source of flatulence in ruminant animals, and the researchers said they thought they could vaccinate against it. While livestock accounts for only 2 percent of U.S. greenhouse gas, it causes over half of New Zealand's. Unless the vaccination is successful, farmers will face a huge tax on methane by 2012 brought on by the requirements of the Kyoto Protocol. [Daily Telegraph (London), 6-5-08]
Anne Greer filed a lawsuit in June against Winter Park, Fla., dentist Wesley Meyers over the death of her father last year during procedures to secure his dentures with implants. During the October 2006 visit, Meyers had accidentally dropped a screwdriver down the patient's throat, which required a colonoscopy to remove. The man returned the following year to give Meyers another chance (against his daughter's wishes), and during that procedure, Meyers accidentally dropped a torque wrench down his throat, creating problems that ultimately proved fatal. [WKMG-TV (Orlando), 6-22-08]
Government in Action!
In April, Army medic Monica Brown was awarded the Silver Star for bravery for selflessly subjecting herself to enemy fire in order to treat fallen comrades in battle in Afghanistan. However, two days after her heroics, she had been ordered home, against her will, because generals were nervous that a female appeared to be "in combat," which violates Army rules. [Washington Post, 5-1-08]
By contrast, in April (according to The Buffalo News), the Army, citing personnel shortages, ordered honorably discharged soldier James Raymond back to duty, even though he is on medical disability for a knee injury and loss of hearing suffered in Afghanistan. (Soldiers on "Readiness Reserve" are still eligible for duty if necessary.) [Buffalo News, 4-16-08]
Closer to Home...
New Zealand man convicted of assault with hedgehog.
WELLINGTON (AFP) - A New Zealand man has been convicted for assaulting a teenager with a hedgehog after asking him if he wanted to "wear a hedgehog helmet".
William Singalargh, 27, was fined for assault and offensive behaviour by a court in the east coast North Island city of Whakatane after a more serious charge of assault with a weapon -- the hedgehog -- was dropped.
Singalargh claimed he was not the hedgehog hurler, but judge Ian Thomas preferred the evidence of other witnesses who identified him by the bright orange trousers he was wearing.
The 15-year-old boy was returning home with two friends when he was confronted by four men on the road outside his home, the court was told.
Singalargh was holding a hedgehog and asked the boy: "Do you want to wear a hedgehog helmet?"
After the boy declined, Singhalargh threw the prickly weapon, leaving a large red welt and four quills lodged in his hip.
When the boy's mother intervened to prevent a second throw, Singalargh pulled down his trousers and exposed his buttocks.
"He admitted to having been in possession of a hedgehog," police Constable Lyndon Reid said.
"He originally claimed that the group had been playing hacky sack with it," Reid said, referring to a game in which the aim is to keep up a small ball or bean bag in the air.
It was not clear if the hedgehog had been dead at the time of the assault, but Thomas described the case as "much do about nothing in many respects".
And...
Methane's longstanding menace as a climate-altering greenhouse gas is closer than ever to being controlled, said New Zealand scientists in June after genome-mapping found the source of flatulence in ruminant animals, and the researchers said they thought they could vaccinate against it. While livestock accounts for only 2 percent of U.S. greenhouse gas, it causes over half of New Zealand's. Unless the vaccination is successful, farmers will face a huge tax on methane by 2012 brought on by the requirements of the Kyoto Protocol. [Daily Telegraph (London), 6-5-08]
The Australian Approach
A young Aussie lad moved to London and went to Harrods looking for a job.
The manager asked 'Do you have any sales experience ?'
The young man answered 'Yeah, I was a salesman back home in Dubbo.'
The manager liked the Aussie so he gave him the job.
His first day on the job was challenging and busy, but he got through it.
After the store was locked up, the manager came down and asked, 'OK, so how many sales did you make today ?'
The Aussie said 'One !'
The manager groaned and continued, 'Just one ? Our sales people average 20 or 30 sales a day. How much was the sale for ?'
The Aussie Answered '£124,237.64. Pounds'
The manager choked and exclaimed '124,237:64 POUNDS !! What the hell did you sell him ?
''Well, first I sold him a small fish hook, then a medium fish hook, and then I sold him a new fishing rod. Then I asked him where he was going fishing and he said down at the coast, so I told him he would need a boat, so wewent down to the boat department and I sold him that twin-engined Power Cat. Then he said he didn't think his Honda Civic would pull it, soI took him down to car sales and I sold him the 4 x 4 Suzuki'.
The manager, incredulous, said 'You mean to tell me....a guy came in here to buy a fish hook and you sold him a boat and a 4x4 ?"
'No no no......he came in here to buy a box of tampons for his lady friend and I said.........'Well, since your weekend's buggered, you might as well go fishing.'
The manager asked 'Do you have any sales experience ?'
The young man answered 'Yeah, I was a salesman back home in Dubbo.'
The manager liked the Aussie so he gave him the job.
His first day on the job was challenging and busy, but he got through it.
After the store was locked up, the manager came down and asked, 'OK, so how many sales did you make today ?'
The Aussie said 'One !'
The manager groaned and continued, 'Just one ? Our sales people average 20 or 30 sales a day. How much was the sale for ?'
The Aussie Answered '£124,237.64. Pounds'
The manager choked and exclaimed '124,237:64 POUNDS !! What the hell did you sell him ?
''Well, first I sold him a small fish hook, then a medium fish hook, and then I sold him a new fishing rod. Then I asked him where he was going fishing and he said down at the coast, so I told him he would need a boat, so wewent down to the boat department and I sold him that twin-engined Power Cat. Then he said he didn't think his Honda Civic would pull it, soI took him down to car sales and I sold him the 4 x 4 Suzuki'.
The manager, incredulous, said 'You mean to tell me....a guy came in here to buy a fish hook and you sold him a boat and a 4x4 ?"
'No no no......he came in here to buy a box of tampons for his lady friend and I said.........'Well, since your weekend's buggered, you might as well go fishing.'
Idiot Sightings
I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local council office to request the removal of the Kangaroo sign on our road. The reason: 'Too many kangaroos are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.'
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